Guilt

By: Karen Lao & Ian Reid

 

      Guilt is a difficult emotion to understand and even more difficult to eliminate.  Worse, it can stay hidden for years, and then suddenly re-appear.  To understand guilt, its reason, its place in our lives, and how to deal with it, are essential to living a life for God.

        Guilt is a natural result of the wrong that we have done; we’ve hurt someone, and we feel bad; it’s a good thing to have wired into us.  Without guilt, we would not be aware that we had done wrong.  Guilt happens, when the cost of doing wrong, is greater than the benefit of doing wrong.  When we hurt, through guilt, it reminds us not to do that bad thing again.

        Guilt forces us to take responsibility for our actions.  It’s a voice that says, “You did wrong.”  In spiritually healthy people, our consciences hold us accountable.  To feel guilt, is to know that we have crossed the line from right to wrong; therefore, we are out of equilibrium.  The guilt is not bad; it is like a warning alarm telling us to act now to fix the problem.  Once the problem is solved the guilt should end.

        Despite this, there are many problems with guilt; thankfully all of them are solvable.

        Initially, we might feel that our sin is unforgivable; therefore, we are beyond forgiveness.  This is not true; God forgives everyone for everything.  The only exception is to sin against the Holy Spirit – this is unforgivable.  Note: please ask a competent pastor about this sin.

        The truth is that your sin is forgiven.  This is such an important point to understand:  God forgives you – totally.  What does the Bible say? 

        Job 11:16 says, “You will forget your misery; you will remember it only as waters that have passed by.”  When God tells you that you will forget your misery; this can mean your guilt.  Think of yourself as standing on a small bridge that is over a little slow-moving stream.  Now, drop a leaf off the bridge and watch as it sits there a few seconds, and then starts to move downstream.  A short while later, it floats around a bend, and then finally…out of sight.  Guilt should be like that.  It should hurt for a little while, just long enough for you to learn from it, and then it should drift slowly out of your memory.

        In Numbers 5:58 God says,

“When a man or woman commits any of the sins that men commit by breaking faith with the Lord, and that person is guilty, he shall confess that sin which he has committed; he shall make full restitution for his wrong.” 

This means that when you have done something wrong, you must confess this to God.  To confess means to admit, and take responsibility for your wrong.  Next you need to repay that person, if this is possible.  The word restitution means to pay back for a wrong that you have done.  You cannot always do this; however, try your best.  For example, if the person has died; then pay back his family.  Inside your heart you will know if you have tried your best to find the person and repay him; however, if you really cannot find the person, or if he is dead and has no family, then by all means, give the money to a church.

        Psalms 32:3-5 is beautiful. 

“When I declared not my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long.  For day and night your [God’s] hand was upon me; my strength was dried up like the heat of summer.  I acknowledged [confessed] my sin to you, and I did not hide my iniquity [sin]; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions [sins] to the Lord’; and you [God] did forgive my sins.” 

The writer of this section says that when he kept his sin a secret (to undeclare, means to keep it secret), then he got terribly sick (to waste away).  God’s hand (his anger) was on the man, and he felt like a person that was dying of thirst in the summer.  Then, the man told God about his sin, and God forgave him.

        In Psalms 103:2 the writer honours God who “forgives all you [his and our] iniquities [sins].” 

        In Isaiah 1:18 God says,

“Though your sins are like scarlet [blood red], they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson; they shall become like wool.” 

Through symbolism, God explains that he will forgive us of our sins; therefore, we must not keep our guilt.

        Isaiah 19:22 says, “And he [God] will heed [listen to] their supplication [begging for mercy, and confession of guilt] and heal them.”  After the confession of guilt, God will heal you.

        Isaiah 40:2 says,

“Comfort, comfort to my people, says your God…her [Israel and our] iniquity [sins] is pardoned [forgiven], that she has received from the Lord’s hand double for all her [and our] sins.” 

Again, God is telling us that we need not keep our guilt.

        Isaiah 44:1 God says, “Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.”  In the sentences before the passage, God says that he has been very angry with His people, but now he tells them not to be afraid because he has redeemed them.  To redeem, means to take back a person that has done wrong.  God’s assurance to us is the same, he forgives us; therefore, we must let go of our guilt.

        In Isaiah 50:9 the writer states, “Behold the Lord God helps me; who will declare me guilty?”  It is God’s right to hold us guilty; it is not the right of other people.  If God forgives us then nobody has the right to hold us guilty of anything.

        In Isaiah 51:22 God says, “behold I have taken from your hand the cup of suffering; the cup of my wrath you shall drink no more.”  Symbolically, the cup of God’s wrath represents God’s anger.  This cup of anger which we’ve had to drink has been taken away by God’s mercy and love.  We have been freed from our guilt.

        In the New Testament, in II Corinthians 5:19 the writer, Paul, states that through Jesus, God has stopped “counting their [and our] trespasses [sins] against them.”  God tells us that because of His love for this Son Jesus; that he will forgive us. We have no guilt, because God forgives us.

        In Romans 5:6-11, the writer explains that it is through the death of Jesus; we are reconciled or brought back to the love of God.  The writer says that because of Jesus’ death; God’s wrath [burning anger] is cancelled.  We are totally forgiven; therefore, we have no need for guilt.

        II Corinthians 5:17-19 the writer Paul states,

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, behold the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry [responsibility] reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself not counting their trespasses [sins] against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.”

        The above passage states, “Anyone” that believes and loves Jesus, is a “new creation.”  A new creation means that he is totally new; with no sin, no past – just brand new.  The fact that he is “a new creation,” means that his sin and guilt are forgotten by God.  The writer explains that Jesus died, in order to clear us of sin; therefore, no sin – no guilt.  We are then given the responsibility to live a life without guilt.

        Jesus’ death brought us back to God’s perfect love.  Our trespasses, which are sins, are all forgiven.  All record of sin is gone; therefore, all guilt is gone.

        Psalms 51 is a beautiful passage, dealing with a man that realizes his guilt, and wants to talk with God about it.

        “Have mercy on me, O God according to your steadfast [strong, never failing] love, according to your abundant [more than enough] mercy [forgiveness] blot out [erase] my transgressions [sins], wash me thoroughly from my iniquity [sins], and cleanse me from my sin!”

        Simply put:  The man wants God to forgive him, and he is confident that God will forgive him because he knows that God’s love and mercy are “abundant.”  He asks God to forget all his sins and to wash him clean of evil.  This man doesn’t want to keep his guilt; he wants to start again and be godly.

        Psalms 38:1 says “O lord, do not rebuke [punish] me in your anger.”  The writer doesn’t want to keep his guilt; he is fearful of God, and is pleading with God to forgive him.  This demonstrates a very healthy attitude towards guilt.

        Jesus’ words were very reasoning to those of us that don’t want to keep our guilt.

        In Matthew 5:7, Jesus says, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.”  This is a very simple message.  Forgive other people when they have hurt you, and God will forgive you when you sin.  Since you are forgiven by God – the only person that can have judgment over you – then you must not keep your guilt.

        In Matthew 9:2, a paralyzed man was brought before Jesus’ to be healed.  Once Jesus healed the man, he said, “Take heart, my son; your sins are forgiven.”  It was important to Jesus to let the man know that He, Jesus, could heal the sins of a person.  In this passage, to heal the sins, means to kill the guilt.  He said this publicly to let the spectators know that He could forgive sin; therefore, when we ask him to remove our sin and guilt; he does just that – he heals us.

        Matthew 18:10 tells the story of a man that has 100 sheep, and one of them gets lost.  He leaves the ninety-nine others, and runs to search for the missing one – once he finds it, he is very happy.  The man in the story represents Jesus; the sheep represent us, and the lost sheep represents a sinner that is lost.  The point of the story is that Jesus wants to find the lost people, and bring them peace from their sins and guilt.  Go to him in prayer; and ask him to forgive you, and then ask him to take away your guilt.

        One of Jesus’ disciples (students) was called Peter.  At the last supper that Jesus had with his disciples; Jesus told them that they would abandon him.  Peter immediately said he would die for Jesus and not abandon him.  Jesus’ response was to tell Peter that before the rooster crowed at dawn; that Peter would deny that he knew Jesus, three times.  This happened.  Once Peter had denied that he knew Jesus for third time the Bible says that he (Peter) went and wept (cried) bitterly (Luke 23:62).

        Note: the entire story of the last supper and Peter’s denial are located in Luke 22:14-62.  In the book of John, Jesus, after he had risen from the dead, visited his disciples; just as he said that he would.  Jesus knew that Peter was suffering terribly because he had hurt Jesus; so he walked up to Peter and confronted him.  Next, he gave Peter the responsibility to feed the lambs (people), and look after them.  Not only was Peter forgiven; he was also given responsibility.  If Peter had kept his guilt, it would have consumed him.  Getting over guilt allows you to be free.  Once you’re free you can do God’s work.

        When Jesus was being crucified, there were two criminals, one on his left and one on his right.  One of the criminals made-fun of Jesus; the other one, who was aware was aware of his own guilt, kept quiet.  He said to Jesus, “Jesus remember me when you get to your kingdom [heaven]” (Luke 23:42).  Jesus answered, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise [heaven]” (Luke 23:43).  Jesus was only a short time from his own death, and in physical and emotional agony; however, he had the kindness to reassure the man that his (the man’s) sins were forgiven.  The man felt great relief, and went to heaven with no guilt.

        Luke 18:1 tells the story of Zacchaeus the tax collector.  Once Jesus make him realize that he (Zacchaeus) has hurt people throughout his life; he tells Jesus that he will repay all those that he has stolen from, four times more than he has taken from them.   Jesus replied “Today, salvation has come to this house” (Luke 18:9).  Zacchaeus’ sins were forgiven; as a result, he was cleansed of guilt.

       

Some random thoughts on guilt

 

        It causes you to isolate yourself from the person that you have hurt, and possibly from their friends and co-workers.  You can’t spread Jesus love by keeping away from somebody.

        By having guilt, you do not believe God when he says many times, and in many ways, that he forgives you.

        It’s possible that God has allowed you hurt the person, to test them to see if they will forgive you.

        Your guilt could be that you want to punish yourself.  If God doesn’t punish you; then you needn’t punish you.

        Guilt might make you see others more rigidly.  The attitude being, that if I’ve done something bad, and can’t forgive myself; then I can’t forgive that action in someone else either.

        To get over guilt is difficult; however, not impossible.  At the very core of healing, is the idea that nothing happens without God’s consent.  There’s no question about it.  You’re forgiven.

        God would never allow you to suffer through needless guilt.  He wants you to leave the guilt behind you.

        Take that frustration and channel it into something positive.

        Pray to God and ask him for the courage to go and apologize to the person.  The other person will probably be surprised, and maybe resentful; however, with God’s power, they will forgive you.  If they don’t’ forgive you; then with humility, wish them well, and tell them that if they change their minds you would love to meet with them.  If it is appropriate, then offer to repay them for the suffering that you have caused.

        Remember, you are there to apologize – not to justify yourself.  Once you start to explain too much, then you run the risk of starting trouble.  Remember Proverbs 10:19, “When words are many; transgression [sin] is not lacking [will follow].”  Simply say, “I’m sorry; please forgive me.

        The strongest words on guilt are said moments before Jesus’ death.  Jesus had been beaten, terrorized, nailed to a cross; and left to die.  His precious blood was dropping from his hands and feet.  He was dehydrating, and having great difficulty breathing.  People were standing around him and laughing, and his mother was standing there in agony.  On top of this all but one of his disciples had abandoned him.  The emotional turmoil was worse.  He had the sins of all humans, past present and future on his shoulders.  He was Jesus; at this moment he could kill all of these people.  He didn’t.  He said “Father [God] forgive them; for they don’t know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34).  He asked his Father to forgive us.  He didn’t want to die, knowing that we would have guilt.

        Trust God with all your guilt.  If you’re really sorry; God knows it; he forgives you.

 

 

                                Our wish is that God will bless you.